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Steve Jobs once said, “The most precious resource we all have is time.” Smart people acknowledge the finitude of this truism and incorporate the truth within in their lives, especially their relationship philosophy.

Why so?

Because you attract success by the person you become – which will be through other people! Who you spend it with, how they make you feel, and how they help you make the most of it.

Know why to determine who.

What drives you more – wealth and status, or fulfilment and contribution towards impacting mankind? Your core values will determine the nature and focus of the relationships essential for attracting the success you seek.

You can assess the impact of current relationships on your success through introspection and honesty by looking at who you spend your time with. They may be helping you move toward your goals or are they may be holding you back, either way you will feel hollow without them.

Notice how your self-worth, productivity, creativity, or confidence shifts after spending time with certain people and evaluate the relationship by asking the big six:

• do they energize or drain me?
• do they challenge me to grow or keep me comfortable?
• do they celebrate my wins or compete with them?
• do they respect my goals – even if they don’t share them?
• do I feel safe being vulnerable and ambitious around them?
• do they care for me?

Just as important in answering the big six is knowing that it’s our reaction to the behaviour of others that lies at the heart of relationship mastery.

How you interpret and respond to that behaviour depends on your ‘filtering’ lens which will be sub-consciously driven by expediency – unless your response is intentional.

Intentionality is well served by the stimulus-pause-response approach (particularly when emotions run high) and will help you curate the life you’re building. Without the pause your best intentions may be scuppered!

I am the author of Leading Self and Others (how to make a difference where you are with what you’ve got) and Teaming with ideas (life lessons in teams- from business, sport and parkrun). You can contact me here.